It was afternoon when two boys went up the ranch to play.
Outside the fences, they saw an abandoned truck.
They approached it and went inside.
One took the driver’s seat but the other protested and tackled his playmate.
Suddenly, the vehicle closed all its door on its own and started running.
They shrieked so loud that even sleeping forest creatures would wake up.
Rolling downhill, the truck accelerated even faster as it approaches the cliff.
Then the vehicle suddenly stopped.
“Tumigil yata (Maybe it stopped).”
Unhurt, they went out and saw something.
“Hala, punso! (An ant hill!)”
As they hurriedly ran away, a nuno sa punso (goblin of the anthill) looks at his shattered home.
A vehicle that moves on its own accord? It must be a Ford Anglia!
Nah, seriously. It was a good story, only there was no transition between accelerating and stopping. The good news is that it’s not overly noticable at first reading.
Wow, you noticed that. I intentionally omitted that part (the stopping) to fit in the 100-words quota. I’ll try editing that some other time. Thanks for visiting.
Cute story. I liked it very much. Don’t worry too much about the 100 word limit, though, especially if you need a few more words to tell the story in complete detail.
I’ll heed your advice. I won’t go for the exact 100-words quota next time. This one is challenging since I don’t have access to computers now. For this post, I used the post-by-email option with the help of my low-end mobile phone and using the free wifi signal from our neighbor. I’ll edit this when I get back to our home. Thanks for visiting.
I agree with Sarah. There have been a few posts that I have written that would have been a lot better had I used a couple more or fewer words…
Great thrill ride! Poor dwarf. I hope he can rebuild. 🙂
For the quality, I’ll write a little longer next time. Thanks for visiting.
I’m glad the stopping part got covered. I enjoy the translations. They add flavor to your tales.
Hello Doug, I enjoyed your take on the prompt. And thanks for coming back this week. Hope you’ll enjoy the weekend.
Imaginative! I wondered if the entire story (I’m certain there’s more) was fantasy or if it is the boys’ imanginations running wild as they sat behind the wheel? Either way, it’s a very good premise for the story prompt. I, too, enjoyed the words with translations–nice touch.
Whoa. If it is just the imagination of the boys? That’s an interesting view. The entire story is paranormal/fantasy. Thanks for visiting again, V.L. Gregory-Pohlenz. I’ll check out yours.
what other rules are there to the 100-word challenge?
Umm. Every wednesday, Madison Woods gives a photo prompt in her blog as our subject for a 100-words story. Get back to her blog on Friday, add a comment with your link, then check out other stories. She has it in details here with the benefits: http://madisonwoods.wordpress.com/flash-fiction/friday-fictioneers/
Very good summary Allen 🙂 Brains I hope you’ll join us soon!
i’m gonna look into that. thanks.
A scary thought! A unique and interesting story. 🙂
Here is the link to mine:
Are you familiar with the white dwarves and their powers? I used to be scared of ant hills when I was younger. Thanks for visiting again. Heading to your story now.
Allen, I am interested in the white dwarf. Did he live in the ant hill, or in the truck? It was a great story all around, but I’m particularly interested in that dwarf.
Hello Madison Woods,
They live in ant hills. We call them “nuno sa punso” (dwarves on the ant hill). Here is the white dwarf in detail: http://tresekomix.blogspot.com/2012/02/you-say-duende-i-say-duwende.html
Thanks for visiting again. I’m looking forward to the next prompt.
I am kerflempt. I never heard of white dwarfs living in ant hills. Regardless, I enjoyed your story and became frightened along with the boys. Nice work. Here’s mine:
I searched about it in the web (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nuno) and I got even more frightened. Due to the nature of the Nuno, which is actually a goblin (according to the wiki entry), he might have his revenge to the boys or to whoever drove the truck. Thanks for dropping by.
I know about anthills ! People are supposed to say,” May I pass ? ” when one happens to see one. Or something like that.
Yes. That’s right. You need to acknowledge the presence of the nuno, who is actually a goblin and not a dwarf according to Philippine mythology. Hehe. Also, nuno literally means grandfather or ancestor and they are easily pissed off.