Finally, school year is almost over

Hello.

When was the last time I posted something here in WordPress?

Sometimes, I am more active in Facebook and Instagram. And when I say active, it doesn’t necessarily mean I post a lot. I usually just hang around and read. Possibly because I ain’t got time for contemplation. Speaking of contemplation, I will facilitate a recollection for the school’s Science Department teachers tomorrow somewhere in Pigcawayan. But that’s tomorrow so I don’t know yet what exactly would happen.

Last Saturday, I facilitated a recollection with a group sharing portion about Jesus raising up Lazarus from the dead (which was the Gospel last Sunday). Each one had to share. As the facilitator, I too had told some stories too. Together with the school canteen staff in the midst of the cool breeze from the sea, I teared up a bit when I disclosed how I missed my family.

And a random guy, who was not part of the group, suddenly caught me off guard when he sat in our cottage and boldly declared that, “There must be a reason why your family is living apart.” But instead of becoming defensive, I responded calmly that there’s actually no problem at allbetween us family members. Made it simpler when I said that instead of discussing there’s really no bad blood between us siblings or parents and it’s just my sister’s family having financial difficulty so she had to work in a foreign country. When he responded out of the blue, I sensed that the sharing mood changed a bit from being serious into uneasy. Maybe the random guy sensed it too so maybe that’s why he left afterwards. Sometimes, when a person shares a story, like the random guy I too tend to over analyze when all I need to do is to sit, listen, and read between the spoken words. That’s why when someone shares a problem with sensitive issue, I tend to ask how she or he feels and to help her/him think for herself/himself. From that experience, I see the wisdom why a facilitator of recollection must not mix their schedule with recreation. And somehow, I had practiced open vulnerability. Maybe non-Filipinos would have difused that question by replying, “It’s none of your business.” But I too am a Filipino who says hello by asking “Where are you going?” when I really have no intention of knowing the destination.

And since this coming Sunday in the start of the Holy Week, us Filipino Marist Brothers would spend a week in contemplation with Br. Michael Green, FMS as our facilitator/speaker. I don’t know him that much. I only know that he’s Australian. Actually, I prefer a silent retreat. But that’s another story.

Oh yeah, that reminds me to prepare a morning prayer and a Marian prayer for Maundy Thursday. Also, my renewal of vows is up next April 15. Just two days before my birthday.

I’ll share next time my toxic experiences during these past three months of teaching this schoolyear.

Is it just I uncomfortable with silence?

If we were having coffee in a weekend, I might be drinking a weak and creamy coffee just like Malcolm Gladwell once said in a TED Talk about spaghetti sauce.
I prefer tea over coffee since it doesn’t contain much caffeine and I palpitate when there’s too much caffeine in a coffee.
Coffee or tea, we will sip these drinks slowly so we could drink slowly and talk a lot.
I don’t know what we are going to talk about since we don’t know much about each other so I might say, “Hi! I am Allen. And you are?”
I warm up slow so I might be just listening more than talking.
If I am not going to initiate enough topics for conversation, you better be the ice breaker since we might end up sitting in silence.
It’s always uncomfortable for me sitting together in silence.
Is it only me just trying to fill up silence with words and conversation?
Avoid silence or encounter the person having coffee with me?
This is how I imagine our first coffee weekend where we get to know each other and I’m just here sipping and listening.
My life’s unconventional so you might ask me some questions that you might not understand as I explain my way of life.
So let’s just keep on sipping coffee or tea every weekend and I might open up more next time.